so tired, so bored, so.. i dont even know how to say..
sometimes i think i just want to like NOT THINK!
D: i dont like to think.. i dont want to think..
but i just cant stop thinking.. so irritating..

why quarrel over stuffs like that? it doesnt mean anything..
everyone is equal, and everyone has a meaning for what they do..
but what if you just dont understand the person?
what if the person thinking and your thinking is different?

really so irritating luh..
when someone talks to me, i still try to smile..
even when i'm feeling down or sad..
because.. i dont want that person who did nothing to me,
feel like its his/her fault..

seriously.. i just want to shut myself out from the world
and stay at home everyday.. i dont really care
i dont want to have anything, i dont want to have anything at all
i dont want to have friends with an attitude that makes me feel like its my fault
i didnt do anything to you

people say that everyone's existance mean something in your life
what if everyone's existance is actually something extra,
you can live without anyone, but when you see someone laughing with someone,
you will feel envious.. but when you see someone quarrelling,
you are glad that you have no friends..

but seriously.. do you even know what friends are?
friends are not for you to make use of,
friends are there to make you smile..
friends are people you can depend on when you feel down
but what if they cant let you?
they are still your friends for god's sake

its not like you owe them or they owe you
making my friends happy, i like doing that..
but what if they make me feel irritated or angry?
i dont really care.. I mean..
They are after all still my friends..

I remembered in Primary School..
i fought with my friend over some misunderstandings..
but.. the next day, i would always talk to her..
because.. she's my friend..
i cant possibly be angry at her forever..

it hurts to hate someone,
thinking about how that person is better than you
or has more things than you..

just think about it.. if you didnt hate that person
you will have an extra friend
whom you can share your thoughts and feelings with
isnt that nice?

rather than hating someone for having what you dont have..
and not realising that you have things that they do not have..
what if their life is so much more unfortunate than yours
everyone is equal.. so it means that when they have something,
they have to lose something as well.

did you know.. there are people who are smart and brilliant
and people go around saying that they hate them..
they might be suffering from an illness that might kill them anytime..

as for people who look beautiful..
they might look beautiful, but they have a deficiency..
i have a few very pretty friends..
but one is deaf, another has a stutter..

Seriously.. DIFFERENT PEOPLE ARE DIFFERENT IN WAYS!
I AM DIFFERENT FROM ALL THE OTHER GIRLS IN THE WORLD
BUT I DONT CARE! I DONT CARE IF PEOPLE CALL ME NAMES
OR EVEN IF THEY MAKE USE OF ME TO DO SOMETHING GOOD FOR THEM..
I DONT CARE OKAY?! they are my friends..

so.. when you do something to my friend..
i will go all out to know your reason
because i know.. that there will be a reason for everything you do..
sometimes.. its frustrating..
because some people just dont listen..
dont they?